My Best Kept Secrets
by ellasdele
Summary: Trigger Warning: Self-Harm, Suicidal Thoughts Elsa has it under control. No really. Those scars? There nothing. Those new cuts? She just had a small relapse. Hospital visit? Accident. Alright, shes got a problem. Question is, will it come to light, and will Anna be able to help her stop if it does?
1. A Little Accident

TW: Self harm, suicidal thoughts

Disclaimer: All characters are intellectual property of Disney, and I in no way intend to make money off of this piece.

If you don't like mention of, **SELF-HARM BY CUTTING** please **DO NOT** read.

Special thanks to the fanfic community, especially the story _r9kElsa Is Suffering_, though while it wasn't direct influence, I was able to get a feel how to start one of these things from it.

Italics with quotation marks are thoughts.

**O0o0O**

Just a really short intro to get you acquainted with how I am going to try and present this. If you have any thoughts or opinions, drop a review. Thanks for reading.

**O0o0O**

"Shit…" she muttered, reaching around trying to find the gauze. _"Where did I put it?"_ Elsa thought to herself. While cutting herself, she thought she heard someone knocking and jumped a little, which isn't really the best thing to do while doing that. So she cut a little too deep.

Then she realized, someone was knocking, and that didn't help her feel any better. This was the last way she wanted her sister to see her, so she threw herself under the covers. While ever-so-gracefully doing so, she smeared blood on the comforter. _"Ugghhh. Now I need to get more hydrogen peroxide."_ She silently complains, not exactly jumping to explain why they run out so quick.

No time to dwell on that, as her red-headed, super energetic sister comes flying through the door. "Elsa guess what! Actually no lemme tell you… no wait guess, ugh never mind I'll just tell you." She screams, filled with excitement.

"Anna, why did you just come in here! I'm not dressed!" Elsa lied.

"Oh well uhm… I'll just wait outside then?" Anna asks more than says.

"OK well go!" Elsa screams, a little harsher then she meant, but the amount of blood she felt like she was losing didn't do much to help her be nice.

After Anna left, Elsa was flying trying to find the gauze, unless she, oh god. She knows where the gauze is. It's gone. She had forgotten to but more, and now she was really gonna pay. First though, she needed something to stop the bleeding. Reaching out after a nice clean _white_ towel, she put it up to her wrist. Woops.

Another hard to explain mistake, and maybe an expensive mistake at that. _"Guess I'm buying more towels then?"_ She thinks, _"Better than trying to explain I guess, but why do we buy such expensive towels?"_

"Elsaaaaa, are you dressed yet? Come on, what's taking so long!" Anna questioned.

"Actually Anna, can this wait, I need to take a shower and I don't wanna keep you waiting?" Elsa asked back.

Then you could hear, just barely, the cute little grumbles of complaint as Anna stomped off like a 2 year old.


	2. A Talk

TW: Self harm, suicidal thoughts

If you don't like mention of, **SELF-HARM BY CUTTING** please **DO NOT** read.

Disclaimer: I, sadly, do not own Frozen or any of the Frozen characters.

Thank you all so much for the follows and favorites, and I apologize for the length of the last chapter. Hopefully a long chapter will make up for that. If you have any comments or concerns please review.

**O0o0O**

After having her shower and getting dressed, Elsa knew she was gonna have to talk to Anna. No matter how much she didn't want to. Or how sick she felt after seeing that her blood soaked onto the mattress.

"Alright Anna, what were you gonna tell me?"

"I got a boyfriend! He's super nice, and handsome, and I think I'm in love!"

Normally, Elsa would have tried to explain to Anna, but she didn't have the patience for that. If Anna wanted to make bad choices, that's up to her. So all Elsa said was "Great!"

Anna, completely oblivious to the annoyance and sarcasm in her big sister's voice, continued on and on about what a great guy he was, while Elsa pretended to care. After about 5 minutes, Elsa finally asked "Well since you know so much about him, what's his name?"

Anna could only just stare. She didn't know his name.

"Well you see… I don't actually know his name." Anna whispers, unable to keep the embarrassed tone out of her voice. That got Elsa's attention.

"Anna, you are so stupid! How can you have so many things to say about someone, yet not know their name?"

"Well you see I didn't actually talk to him" Anna said meekly.

That made Elsa pretty mad. She started lecturing about how Anna didn't know what love is, how she was too young for love, and pretty much anything else she could think. As Elsa continued on, Anna just kept thinking and thinking, completely ignoring her sister's words. After a while Anna shouted out "His name is Hans! Of course, that's what his friend said!" Elsa visibly face-palmed. Her sister had essentially stalked this boy Hans, claimed to be in love, and didn't see anything wrong with any of it.

"Anna, you do realize he might have a girlfriend?" Elsa stated matter-of-factly

"No Elsa, his friends said something about him just breaking up with someone." Anna retorted

At this point, Elsa realized that arguing with her stubborn little sister would get her nowhere.

"Alright Anna good luck with your crush, I'm gonna go out."

After leaving her sisters room, Elsa had no plans of going out. She didn't have any friends, nor did she like social situations. Elsa went straight for the outside door, and then came in through the kitchen door.

"Finally I can play some WoW." Elsa said, rather annoyed with her sisters constant talking. On the very rare occasions she talked to her sister, her sister felt the need to, in her words, make up for lost time. Sure, Elsa didn't leave her room much, but that was no reason to bug her when she did.

**O0o0O**

_3 hours later_

While raiding, Elsa thought she heard a knock on her door. Her first reaction was to make sure the door was locked. She started leaving her door unlocked, but now after the incident with Anna barging in to her room, she is transitioning back to locking it. After making sure it was locked, she thought whoever was outside would go away, but not today. She heard more knocking, more forceful this time, and muted her headphones, just in case someone had something important to say. Also not going to happen. All she heard was an indignant huff.

Later, she started cutting, when, yet again, she was interrupted by knocking. _"Jeez can't people just give me some god-damn alone time? It's like they know I'm doing something I shouldn't be."_ This time at least, she didn't jump. Nope, no more accidents for her, she has everything perfectly under control. Just ignore them and they will go away. Which they did after a few more attempts at knocking. _"Good, I'm glad I didn't have to talk to them." _She thought, and then she realized she still hadn't bought any gauze. Or cleaned the towel. Or bed. Or anything else really. _"Well, at least I didn't clean the towel, less water wasted."_


	3. Isolation & Medication

TW: Self harm, suicidal thoughts, attempted suicide

If you don't like the mention of **SELF-HARM BY CUTTING** please **DO NOT** read.

If you don't like the mention of **ATTEMPTED SUICIDE** please **DO NOT** read.

Disclaimer: I own only the plot, sadly, because I am not Disney.

I, yet again, apologize for the length of the last chapters, so I am trying to make a longer one for you guys. I was gone for so long because of some family and personal issues. Hopefully you guys can forgive me and enjoy. I am going to gradually increase the length, tell me when it is to your liking please. Remember to R&R!

**O0o0O**

_2 weeks after last chapter_

Elsa has, like old times, been secluding herself in her room. Her parents bring her food and Anna just hopes that Elsa will come and talk to her. Only two people know, partially, the reason, and that is Elsa and her only friend, Olaf. After going and playing WoW, Elsa called Olaf and asked him to pick her up. It's not that she doesn't have her own car, she does, it's that she didn't want her family knowing she was going out. By out, I mean to the hospital. She just wanted to be sure that the cuts on her arms, especially the one she made deep on accident, were ok. Olaf, being such a good friend, didn't ask. He only knew that she wanted to go to the hospital. Olaf thinks it might just be she got hurt and wants to lie down, but that's not the reason.

The real reason is Elsa doesn't want anyone, most importantly, Anna, finding out about her cutting. She thinks her and everyone else will see her as disgusting and hate her. _"Why wouldn't they"_ she reasons _"I do"_ So she waits for the bandage to come off and the red marks to become less noticeable. Well that would have been fine if she was stronger.

Everyday Anna would come knocking at her door and try to coax her out, but mostly ends up leaving in tears, or sleeping on the floor. As much as it hurts Elsa to hear her little sister cry, she doesn't want Anna to hate her, that would be too much._ "Might as well just kill the monster causing her pain"_ She can hear the voice in her head suggesting, no, pushing her to end herself._ "It's not like she really cares, she just wants you to stop being so weird"_ Here she finds herself, empty pill bottle of phenobarbital in hand, having just taken all of them. _"Nononono what did you do, how stupid are you, you can't leave Anna like this, who is gonna drive her to school and make her brownies and and and…"_ She pulls out her phone and calls Olaf.

"OLAF YOU GOTTA COME GET ME RIGHT NOW PLEASE IT'S AND EMERGENY" she screams, right when he answers the phone.

Normally, he would make a joke somewhere along the lines of 'Well hey there to you to' but he can hear the panic evident in his best friends voice. All he says is "be right there" then hangs up and runs to his car to come get her.

**O0o0O**

Anna, hearing Elsa screaming, decides to 'bend the rules' and take Elsa's car to follow them to wherever they are going. Normally Anna wouldn't break the rules, since she is sorta a goody-two-shoes, but frankly, she's is tired of being avoided by Elsa, and she is going to get to the bottom of her strange behavior.

After a short game of follow the leader at an extended distance, Anna pulls into a parking lot at Arendelle Health, the nearby hospital. _"Hmmm, wonder what they are doing here, Elsa isn't hurt is she?"_ Just like that Anna starts panicking that Elsa maybe hit her head or something. Then, she sees Olaf carrying an unconscious Elsa into the hospital. By the time she realizes she is supposed to be sneaking around, she is already running towards them yelling for Olaf to stop. She stopped, hoping he hadn't heard but he did. Then he just went into the hospital, hoping Anna wouldn't follow.

**O0o0O**

After Olaf got them to take Elsa by explaining she may have overdosed on her anxiety meds, he made sure to get Anna to not call anyone until Elsa woke up. If she did. That got him a solid knee to the nuts, and he really did deserve it. So there they waited, and waited, and waited, until a nurse came out and said she may be out for a week or longer. In the end, Olaf had to drag Anna out from hospital and follow her home.


End file.
